I once was lost but now I'm found

You told me today that it doesn't have to be fine. You said you'd protect me. I know I don't need to be okay with feeling unsafe. I know that I'm protected. But I can't say that I'm not fine. I can't say that everything isn't okay. Putting a burden on someone for them to carry is what I hate. And I know that I won't even be carrying this burden myself, I'm sharing it with God. Even if you don't believe me when I say I'm fine, just know that I will be fine. It will be okay, even if not now.

Knowing that God really does answer our prayers is a just a reassuring thing. From the smallest things like giving me a voice to sing while I'm sick to resolving problems with friends, He answers. The real challenge is accepting His answer when it's a 'no' or 'later'. It's so hard to accept that God doesn't always say yes to everything because He has greater plans for us. But this is what he wants for us, and as His child, we need to accept it, for He works for the good of those who love and trust Him. My God is a God who intervenes into my life and I live every moment knowing He is loving and good.

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. -1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 Have the tendency of not praying/rejoicing often enough. Gotta really take Jesus and Paul as an example. Prayyyyyyyyy Annie, PRAYYY.

Tell me honestly,  am I a burden to you? Am I annoying to you? Do you reqlly love me even though I'm problematic? Even though I'm made of flaws. Do you genuinely care? I doubt it.

I'm such a burden to my parents. I worry my mum so much, I can see it. Her concerned look when the doctor said I was to be on contraceptive pills, I'm such a burden. I just, don't want to worry them anymore. I want to show them that I can take care of myself, that I'm independent. But I know I can't. They will always see me as the worrisome child. I feel so...lost, God. I feel like my existence is a burden to everyone. I don't want to be. I just want to disappear from everyone's lives, leave not a trace, take that burden off them. Be one less worry. But I know however much I try, I'm only increasing their burdens. I'm such a burden. What can I do Daddy? Show me your ways.