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Battles within the heart

God, should I not be placing my identity in you?
So then, what is stopping me?  Your grace is sufficient, yet why do I feel so inadequate?
"I am the bread of life" you say, and yet I feel so unsatisfied- still seeking earthly pleasures rather than the treasures of heaven.
Who am I that I may receive your grace? Nobody.
What do I gain from seeking earthly pleasures such as human relationships and acknowledgement of my abilities?
Nothing.

I know, yet I don't do. I understand, yet I don't understand. I see, yet I don't believe.

Why have you taken my ability to bear children away? What shall come of this? My inadequacy stems from the fact that this has been taken away. Yet this was how you created me.

Fix your identity on Jesus- the one who saved you, even in your brokenness, even in your sin. The one broke the chains of sim and death, and gave you an eternity with Him. The one who restored you into a relationship with Him, and  made you perfect in His sight.
Seek the things above, for things of this earth are fleeting and will pass away.

I need you Jesus, to be the Lord of my life. To take away these feelings of inadequacy, and fix my eyes on you. To teach me day by day to live according to God's will.

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A "short" update

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Apparently not stressed enough.

Why don't my parents do the HSC if they think it's so easy? So, basically, I got my report last night and when my dad saw it, he just kept repeating the fact that my marks were crap and that I'm doing horribly. "You should be the top of the school" My mum wasn't any better, saying that I didn't do well and I need to work harder. Why do they only look at extension maths? I KNOW I FAILED IT. As if I don't feel crappy already. Don't cry. You can't cry.  You're not allowed to cry.

Faithful

A timely reminder in the midst of chaos.