Hasn't been a good few days- been crying pretty much everyday since Monday.
Reasons? Well...
1. Getting marks from my first assessments back weren't the best and having people deliberately rub it in my face wasn't good either. (It really has gotten to a point where it's deliberate and I'm on the verge of slapping her for being inconsiderate to her peers- not just because of me, but for everyone else...but that won't happen.) I'm finding it really difficult to forgive her for it. But I know I have to.
2. Mum hasn't been the most helpful in terms of stress relieving. Let's talk about what was my fault first. I was really unhappy with the fact that I came home to a lot of shouting and so I was really moody. And since I was moody, I didn't want anyone to come in and disturb me, but my sister came in and I shouted at her. I also slapped her out of fury even though she was just trying to help out. So, I understand that mum shouted at me for being an idiot. (Cried because I felt so guilty afterwards.)
The other thing was that the moment I left my room after getting ready, mum gave me a lecture. The first things she talked about were the events of the day before and my idiotic actions. I could deal with that. Then she spoke about how I should be the older sister in the household- but I don't want that even though it's the way things are. I don't want the responsibility- but okay, fine. I won't whinge about it because it's inevitable. Once she talked about how the family's poor financial situation is because I spend a lot, I snapped. Wow. Thank you. Just place it all on me. Keep telling me that I don't help out enough, that I don't do anything but spend money. Thank you so much.
Well, that's my week in a nutshell.
Reasons? Well...
1. Getting marks from my first assessments back weren't the best and having people deliberately rub it in my face wasn't good either. (It really has gotten to a point where it's deliberate and I'm on the verge of slapping her for being inconsiderate to her peers- not just because of me, but for everyone else...but that won't happen.) I'm finding it really difficult to forgive her for it. But I know I have to.
2. Mum hasn't been the most helpful in terms of stress relieving. Let's talk about what was my fault first. I was really unhappy with the fact that I came home to a lot of shouting and so I was really moody. And since I was moody, I didn't want anyone to come in and disturb me, but my sister came in and I shouted at her. I also slapped her out of fury even though she was just trying to help out. So, I understand that mum shouted at me for being an idiot. (Cried because I felt so guilty afterwards.)
The other thing was that the moment I left my room after getting ready, mum gave me a lecture. The first things she talked about were the events of the day before and my idiotic actions. I could deal with that. Then she spoke about how I should be the older sister in the household- but I don't want that even though it's the way things are. I don't want the responsibility- but okay, fine. I won't whinge about it because it's inevitable. Once she talked about how the family's poor financial situation is because I spend a lot, I snapped. Wow. Thank you. Just place it all on me. Keep telling me that I don't help out enough, that I don't do anything but spend money. Thank you so much.
Well, that's my week in a nutshell.
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